On The Cusp Of The Weekend
The Great Potato Beat Down of ’06
A lot of people are impatient, and some of those people happen to be holding a bag of potatoes. See where I’m going with this? If not we will use an example. A woman in Liberty township was pissed about having to wait in line at a grocery store so after a manager spoke to her she hit him in the head with a 10 pound bag of potatoes. She then went home and made some , or at least one would speculate.
The Great Chicken Wait of ’06
As much as I would like to make fun of the people who have been waiting outside of Chick-fil-A in North Olmstead for its grand opening, I really don’t think I can. Instead I’d like to state that I am angry, quite fucking angry. Because I was never informed that the first 100 people in line would receive a one year supply of combo meals.
Even American Greetings Wants to Kick us While We’re Down
What is American Greetings latest holiday card like?
“a man in a black-and-white photo walking past an urban landscape, reads: “Season’s Greetings from Cleveland . . . America’s Poorest City!” And inside, ‘Happy Holidays.’”
Most people have their panties in a bind because of the fine line between satire and mockery, but here is my issue. Black and white? Shit, man, I could make a color card on my computer. Why am I going to pay for a black and white card? Also, why doesn’t St. Louis get a similar one, you know with, “Season’s Greetings from St. Louis… America’s Most Dangerous City!” And I’m sure some place in New Jersey could easily take the “smelliest” or “ugliest” title. I am going to stop right now before I give you idea thieves anymore… ideas, and just start making these cards myself.
This Weekend The Whole City is Tripping Balls
Blake Miller leads a freaky folky bonanza at Parish Hall tonight while tomorrow night Tower 2012 hosts a mind-expanding craze fest of epic proportions!!! Or something like that, look at the flyer below.
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