In Bowling, We’d Call This a Turkey

In Case You Needed Advice on How to Be Lame

The Scene is keeping an eye out for you if you’re not the social type. They have searched all corners of the web and found a “holiday-party excuse generator.” Apparantly you are asked a few questions about the party you’ve been asked to attend, and the generator will write a brief excuse as to why you can’t make it. Sounds cool, I guess but who doesn’t like crashing parties and making fun of everyone there?

I’m Doing This Because I Can

Our good friends over at Parish Hall are featured in an article in the Free Times this week. The article points out the somewhat professional attitude the owners of the hall are taking to ensure that a DIY space is going to stay available in the area and not be run out by the city. On top of all that, I heard the dude who wrote this is pretty all right.

40-Year-Old Truck Driver Has 15-Year-Old Sense of Humor

An Elyria man was caught throwing a rock out of his truck and damaging another car. I know, I know, “AN ACCIDENT!” you say. Well upon some investigation, police found a lot of rocks in the dudes cab, and they are pinning dozens of other rock-induced damages on him. If you ask me, this guy’s being set up and there is some major conspiracy shit going on.